100% Free Dating Sites

A review of 100% Free Dating Sites

Be Aware

Somebody is always calling up my program and saying “Everything was going really well and then all of a sudden….” and I say , “Nonsense. You’re either dealing with a psychopath, somebody who deserves an Academy Award, or you weren’t paying attention.” Guess which of these three is most often is. That’s right: You weren’t paying attention.

Sophocles said the unexamined life is not worth living, and I say the unexamined date is a waste of time. Pay attention to your date and to your own responses. You don’t have to constantly monitor as though your date were in dating ICU and liable to expire at any moment, but be willing every once in a while to step out a bit and see what’s going on. How are you? How does the date seem to be doing? Are you happy? Is it fun? Are you being attentive? Do you need more sleep? Are your senses being dulled? Being dense is a tough way to lead your life and dangerous when you’re dealing with someone else who wants you tuned in.

Listen up. Look up. Live it up. Love it up.


July 9, 2009 Posted by | Dating, Relationships | , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Be Creative

You’re not like anybody else on the planet, and neither is your date, so why do the two of you have to follow anybody else’s rules or precedents about what you want, how you act, where you go, or how you communicate? If it’s okey with the two of you – and it’s not illegal – then why not?

I’m not talking necessarily sex here. I’m talking the two of you being original about how to talk and how to act, and finding the courage as well as the fun to be whoever the two of you are, individually and together. For example, is Strawberry jam a great Valentine’s gift or not? I don’t know. Whether it’s a great V-day gift depends on how the two of you feel about it. Be willing to experiment and be your best, most original self.

Of course, this doesn’t mean you have to startle or shock, but you may surprise yourself at how interesting you can be when you follow your own heart. (And your originality can be a great catalyst to your date’s creativity as well.) If it works, zowie. If it doesn’t, the two of you can talk about it, figure out why not, and come up with alternatives – or decide that you’re really not a great match.

When it comes down to it, isn’t the point to fashion our lives, individually and together, as something precious and rare and meaningful to each of us?

July 8, 2009 Posted by | Dating, Relationships | , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Write Stuff Down

All of us have been talking for a lot longer than we’ve been writing, which is why a blank page seems so intimidating, but when it comes to being honest and keeping track, writing stuff down is an instant combination shortcut and mirror. You don’t have to write an essay or poetry, and no one’s going to be grading for spelling or punctuation. This is simply your way of keeping track. (Little girls often begin the habit to a diary around seven or eight when an auntie gives them a diary.)

A log (not a Captain James T. Kirk kind of log, but a feelings log) can be really useful and helpful and helpful to pinpoint important times, beginning of issues and changes in the relationships. It’s a great way to keep us honest and focused, and as long as it isn’t left around for someone to find and read there is no downside here. A log also is a way of taking responsibility privately so we can practice before we take it publicly.

July 6, 2009 Posted by | Dating, Relationships | , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Re-Evaluate Often

Something that made you happy or behavior that pleased you or someone who rang your chimes once may or may not be in for the long haul. The only way of knowing the short-term from the long-term is to be willing to take your own emotional pulse from time to time.

If you’re happy and you know it, not only clap your hands, but enjoy, and if you have a few extra moments, try to figure out why you’re happy (although, to b quite honest, most of us don’t; we just let the good times roll and rule). But if you’re miserable (or even if there seems to be just a tiny pinch), for heaven’s sake, take a moment and see whether you can figure out alternatives and understand cause and effect (what makes you feel the way you do). Don’t waste time blaming; just try to be specific and active and responsible and problem-solve.

July 3, 2009 Posted by | Dating, Relationships | , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Don’t settle

A life is a series of compromises – going left when you wanted to go right because the taxi cut you off, taking the chicken on the buffet table because the prime rib was all gone, going to the prom with your best friend because you thought your dream date would turn you down. There’s nothing bad or wrong about being flexible. The trick is knowing when to compromise and when to go for it.

To do that, you have to know what’s really important to you, and once you know that, don’t settle. If you don’t have what you want, make sure you do know what you want – being both realistic and specific – and then go for it. You can always re-evaluate. What most people regret is not the mistakes they made, but the chanves they didn’t take.

July 2, 2009 Posted by | Dating, Relationships | , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Be Active

In our society, we seem to have become a nation of crybabies and busybodies. We’ve all become professional victims. The best way to not feel victimized is to do something, (almost) anything. Don’t wait for someone to call you. Either call them, take a walk, scrub the floor, scrape gum off your shoes, or jog. Don’t wait for them to make your day or make you happy or get the ball rolling. This is your life, not a dress rehearsal.

Nobody likes to be around someone who was no opinions, no energy, no personality. Do something and watch the world watch you.

July 1, 2009 Posted by | Dating, Relationships | , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Take Responsibility

This is a way cool rule for life as well as for dating. Nothing makes people angrier that the “who me?” routine. All of us make mistakes – sometimes because we are thoughtless, sometimes because we are clueless, often out of ignorance. But when it’s clear we blow it, even though every instinct is saying play dump, we need to accept responsibility: If you’re late, ‘fessing up – “I’m late, I’m sorry, and I didn’t leave enough time” (or “I got caught up and lost track of the time” or even “you’ve kept me waiting; I thought I’d try payback”) – is still much better than playing dumb.

Besides, playing dumb is an expensive defense: Think back a few years to when you got caught with chocolate on your face, and your mom said, “Who ate the icecream?” and you said, “I don’t know.” Remember her response? “It was bad enough you ate the ice cream, but I’m going to punish you twice for lying.” Ouch. Not taking responsibility when you know ya done it is the mom-and-chocolate-ice-cream scenario all over again.

On the other hand, if you are genuinely baffled or completely innocent (yeah, right), saying, “I don’t know what the problem is, but I’m sure it’s my fault cause – it always is.” is a particularly odious way of not taking responsibility by seeming to take it. ‘Face up if you’re sure: think about it if you’re not: and if you’re genuinely baffled, say “I feel really dumb, but I truly don’t know. Are you will to help me out here?” There really can be honest differences, and if you’re known as somebody who takes responsibility, folks cut you a lot more slack than if you’re a slacker

June 30, 2009 Posted by | Dating, Relationships | , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Be Specific

Often when we talkĀ  about the opposite sex, we either go all gooey and soft focus or we become harsh and judgmental. Neither stance is particularly helpful. Look carefully at the details. Being specific is one of the best ways not only to problem solve but to be realistic as well.

Abstraction almost always get us in trouble. Saying “This relationship isn’t working for me” makes everybody unhappy and anxious. Saying “It makes me nervous when you’re more than five minutes late while I’m waiting on a street corner for you because I once saw a pedestrian hit by a car” is much less threatening and much more helpful in terms of offering a problem and solution.In this approach, you could agree to wait inside, your partner could promise to be early from now on, or you could get some therapy about the pedestrian trauma. My point is that specificity gives everybody a place to start with a minimum of blaming or value judgement.

June 29, 2009 Posted by | Dating, News, Relationships | , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Ten Tips to happy Dating

When you think of dating happily, you may think of spending time with an interesting and neat person, doing lots of fun and exciting things together, and connecting intimately. Yet those are only a few of the things that go into it. In this part are ten more things that, although they may not pop immediately to mind, are also keys to having rewording and fun dating experiences, they are:

  • Be Realistic
  • Be Specific
  • Take responsibility
  • Be active
  • Don’t Settle
  • Re-evaluate often
  • Write stuff down
  • Be creative
  • Be aware
  • Analyze fear

Continue Reading…………

June 25, 2009 Posted by | Dating, Relationships | , , , , , , | 2 Comments